Having been immersed in American business culture for 16 years prior to taking the plunge into the realm of all things swimming full-time, I’ve personally been exposed to more linguistic jargon than I would ever care to repeat. Business loves its buzzwords, with new ‘isms’ coming out every year just to make an hour-long conference call even that much more unbearable. Now that I’ve moved on from corporate culture, as an ode to business buzzwords, I’ve translated some of my favorites into swimming expressions. Try them on for size with teammates at your next practice and include your favorite swimming buzzwords in the comments.
‘Drink the Kool-Aid’
In a business environment, this phrase typically represents that brown-noser sitting in the cube next to you who nods and says ‘yes, sir/ma’am’ to everything a boss says, not even knowing why he or she is in agreement.
Pool Translation – ‘Drink the Pool Water’ (actually, don’t do that, that’s totally gross)
‘Take it Offline’
During a conference call or video meeting, ‘taking it offline’ means to have yet another fun and exciting sidebar conversation on a particular topic, possibly with a smaller group of associates.
Pool Translation – ‘Talk about it after practice’ – is anything you’re not able to spit out during 10 second rest intervals at the wall even really worth talking about?
‘Giving 110%’
In the office working world, going above and beyond to get noticed by your boss or client is sometimes your entire day’s goal. But, we swimmers live in a sport that’s all about numbers, so we know there is no such quantity over 100%.
Pool Translation – Um, just give the numerically possible 100% effort.
‘Wantrepreneur’
A relatively new business buzzword, this describes someone who has the dreams of a Steve Jobs, but with the resources and means of a first grader.
Pool Translation – In the sport of swimming, a wantrepreneur is an athlete who has plans to be the next Michael Phelps or Katie Ledecky, but who shows up to practice once a week and then proceeds to nurse a mysterious injury at the wall for most of the session.
‘Al Desko’
Swimmers are all about food, so the thought of having to scrounge a meal in about 10 minutes while sitting at one’s desk in the working world may make us cringe. But, alas, such is the corporate life, where you rush from meeting to meeting and phone call to phone call, taking a bite in between slides of a deck presentation.
Pool Translation – ‘Al Decko’; Yes, some swimmers are known to take a quick bite on the sidelines during practice, whether it be a squishy power gel before grabbing a kickboard or mooching a carrot or pistachio from their coach’s nearby stash to get them through the next set.
‘Bio Break’
Obviously people take bathroom breaks in the business world, but you know you’re in a downward meeting spiral when the host actually has to schedule ‘bio breaks’ for the entire group.
Pool Translation – We take bio breaks all the time without even having to leave the office, er, pool……right??
‘Drill Down’
When talking through a complicated business topic, there’s often a request for a subject matter expert to ‘drill down’ the topic into easier to digest parts.
Pool Translation – To help learn a complicated stroke (breaststroke anyone??) swimmers just ‘drill’…..
‘Silo’
What some may think of as a tower to store grain on a farm, corporate worker bees use to describe one’s area of expertise or ‘vertical knowledge’.
Pool Translation – You are one with your lane and your lane is with you.
‘Body of Work’
Often used to describe what a company does or the output a business produces, this buzzword has a completely different meaning when going underwater.
Pool Translation – We literally are bodies of work in our aquatic environments. Our swimmer bodies symbolize all of the hours, blood, sweat and tears mixed with chlorine on a daily basis as we pursue our own visions of success.